Inspiring coaches master their emotions and deal with them effectively. As a result, they are able to keep the main objective in mind and communicate their goal without getting caught up in their emotions. They move from being emotional to being emotionally intelligent.
“A leader’s emotions are highly contagious,” writes Annie McKee, a senior fellow at the University of Pennsylvania Graduate School of Education and author of How to Be Happy at Work, in a blog on Harvard Business Review. So, you want to “manage your feelings accordingly to create the kind of environment where people can work together to make decisions and get things done.”
Controlling your emotions does not mean being emotionless. In fact, most people like and appreciate emotion as long as it is appropriate and constructive. Mastering your emotions enables you to intentionally elevate or calm your own and others’ emotions to achieve a desired outcome.
People will mirror your emotions. That’s why discussions can easily become heated and counterproductive; each party matches and escalates the level of emotion. It’s a lose-lose situation.
As the leader and coach, when you are aware of your emotions and keep an eye on the outcome instead of needing to be right, you can de-escalate the emotional tone of the conversation and enable clearer heads to work toward the desired outcome. It’s a win-win. The mutual goal is more likely achieved and the relationship is enhanced instead of damaged.
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“Lee and Julie deliver powerful lessons with simple, concise language. As inspirational as it is practical. A vital tool for leaders at any career stage. An extraordinary book!” – Dr. Marshall Goldsmith, The Thinkers50 #1 Leadership Thinker in the World